1) First World creates Monster.

2) Monster breaks cage and escapes.

3) Monster eats people nearby.

4) First World gives zero fucks.

5) People run away and try to hide from Monster inside First World.

6) First World says, no no, you can’t come in here, that’s y’all problem.

7) People don’t move, ’cause Monster back there.

8) First World says, well, OK, you can come in, but only a few.

9) Hidden among the few, enters Monster.

10) Monster eats Paris.

11) First World says Monster eating Paris is the same as Monster eating all of humanity… even though Monster already begun eating all of humanity before, when it bit Iraq, devoured Syria and chewed Lebanon. Paris is just dessert, coffee and a cigarette.

12) First World cries and invites everyone to cry with it; their tears are the same salty mixture of those shed by the victims of the Interahamwe, another, earlier First World Monster that acquired its armament from… France. Interahamwe Monster ate 800,000 in 1994. First World gave zero fucks.

13) First World blames people running away from Monster for Monster eating Paris.

14) First World condemns people that don’t show support and want to speak of paternity issues and geopolitical irresponsibility calling them Monster sympathizers.

15) The whole world can clearly hear Monster call on First World saying, Papa! Why you no love me? Why you create me and leave me? I’ll make you pay!, but First World turns a deaf ear and calls Monster insane, fanatic, bloodthirsty… traits that it bred purposefully into its DNA from the beginning.

16) Misery and instability in Monster’s wake create business opportunities for First World entrepreneurs. First World soon starts getting pretteh things for cheap and asks no uncomfortable questions about it.

17) In two weeks Facebook cons and libs return to giving zero fucks and posting cat videos. Profile pics lose the French flag tricolor filter.

18) In three to four weeks First World forgets Paris, forgets Monster, forgets people running away from Monster.

19) People running away from Monster, mangled by Monster, shat on by Monster, displaced by Monster forget nothing.

Coming soon… another Monster! But, where will the First World lay its next horrid egg? Don’t miss the following episode of this tragicomedy that has everybody right at the edge of their seats!